Just Another Day

"It's just been such a busy year," Shanku said at length with a sigh. "Two summers ago, things were still simple. I was on the road, travelling from one town to the next, no real pressure to do anything except to just enjoy life. Then I got to the north, the high priestess told me about the impending war and made me responsible for trying to get it to end, then there was the tournament, although that part was actually a lot of fun, and then when I got back home all the old drama, resentment, and doctrines were back. 'Mind your place', 'stay in your caste', 'don't do this', 'don't do that', and, oh, hey, 'your first season is around the corner and somebody is already flirting with you'!" Shanku finished with an exasperated shout.

"So you ran away?" Eru asked without judgment.

"Yeah, I guess, in a way I did," Shanku said quietly.

"That was a good deal to put on a young dam," Eru remarked. "A return to simpler times does seem a wise course until you're ready to continue."

"I don't know if I want to though," Shanku sighed. "All the rules, regulations, expectations, the sneers and jeers. But I need to hurry up and get over this, because Muso isn't quite big enough to keep protecting Hilael, even if they're starting to cut him some slack, I've got responsibilities as a warrior-in-training, and I dunno if anybody will ever have Katari..."

"I suppose Katari was the one flirting with you?" Eru asked shrewdly.

"Yes," Shanku blushed. "Yes, it was Katari. My old childhood friend before I got given the boot."

"Do you actually care for him or just feel responsible for him?" Eru pried.

"That's the thing. I don't know," Shanku shifted uneasily. "I never really thought about him that like that. Or anybody like that. Ma says 'your first is always your worst', and I didn't want to risk doing something I'd regret in a surge of misguided passion."

"Understandable," Eru nodded. He looked at her uncomfortably from the corner of his eye.

"It's already come and gone, you're safe," Shanku said flatly. Eru tried to hide his sigh of relief. "Any suggestions?" she asked.

"Just keep an open mind and open heart when you go back," Eru replied thoughtfully. "Both feelings are bound to be there. Just see if the one that matters is stronger. You're a full dam now, you can make your own decisions."

"I don't feel full grown though," Shanku said.

"Nobody ever does," Eru said with a grin. "Zihna said it took her until Hinto was talking well until she felt grown."